Lyric Fire: NaPoWriMo 2012 – Day 19 of 30 Poems in 30 Days – You Dream, I Sleep (The Remix!)

NaPoWriMo 2012 – 30 Poems in 30 Days – Day 19

Another day, another poetry challenge! The fine people over at the NaPoWriMo site thought it would be fun to issue the challenge of writing a poem in the vein of Opposite Day. I never celebrated or even heard of this holiday, but, it seems like great fun! The whole crux of the day means that everything you say, do, see, and hear are the opposite. If you say go left, you mean go right. If you say look up, it means look down. If you say, “I really love your hair,” you actually mean you hate it! So we are to choose one of our own poems or someone else’s and rewrite it so that each line is the opposite of the original. Yikes! I will do my best! I have chosen a poem I wrote last year called, You Sleep, I Dream. My reworked version is called, You Dream, I Sleep. The original version will be posted just below the reworked one so you can compare. I hope you all will be just as confused as I am! Enjoy!

 

You Dream, I Sleep (Reworked!)

 

Your head bounces up off the pillow and mine reclines

My mind is transported to many locations and all I can see is you

I travel long distances bathed in your light

Wishing for more

Fill my space, my every pore

I drink you like wine

Only thinking of you

You’re beyond my reach

I long to stay right here

Lounge in your presence

To experience

To sing and let you know

My love is yours alone

And I do

But you don’t hear me

I am comforted by you still

I will wait patiently

Until you’re ready for me

When your eyes open I will be gone

Temporarily

To give you space

And provide oxygen for your thoughts

Giving you the pleasure and peace of being alive with me telepathically

When you sleep your senses will be at ease

Knowing I am at reach and forever yours

I will leave you when you need space and give you pleasure when I return

I will grant you solace in the confines of my love

We can do this dance for the moment

I have all the patience in the world

You dream, I sleep

Thinking about ways to capture your love

Perhaps we can snooze together one day

Then discuss the pleasure of our future later

Destroying all doubt

So we can revel in the excitement of our love

 

You Sleep, I Dream (Original!)

 

Your head hits the pillow and mine pops up

I’m going nowhere fast and it’s because you’re not here

I go through days in a fog

Wishing for a clearing

An airing out of you

No matter how much wine I drink

Or how many other eyes I get lost in

You’re right there staring back at me

I booked a trip to a far off land

To get away for awhile

To think

To write

To lounge in the love of other strangers

But

Echos

Footsteps

Drumbeats

And mind music

Are drowning out the sounds of my reality

Pulling me back into the past of our yesterday

No matter what I do to try and get away you’re always there

So to pay you back for your unwillingness to leave

I will sleep and haunt your dreams

Role reversal mind control

When your eyes close I will be there

Stealing the oxygen from your air

Removing the pleasure and comfort of slumber

When you wake your senses will be on overload

Wondering where I am and what I’m doing

I will come to you when day turns dark consecutively for one thousand nights

Thats how many times you kissed me

If you then don’t leave my consciousness

I will return to dampen your dreams for three thousand additional nights

As that is the number of times we connected oh so intimately

If you refuse to leave me alone

I will haunt you forever as

Unfortunately that is the time frame that I will always love you

We can do this dance for eternity

I may not have the patience

But I have the time

You sleep, I dream

About ways to be rid of you

Perhaps we can wake together one day

To discuss the pain of our past

Heal it and move on to the fun of the future

Together or apart

We need closure so we both can

Dream in peace

 

For more delicious servings of poetry this month, please visit these bloggers as they are also participating in NaPoWriMo!Β 

© 2012 – 2014, TamekaMullins. All rights reserved.

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

Apr 19, 2012 | Posted by in Blog, NaPoWriMo 2012, Tamstarz Poetry | 10 comments

Comments (10 Responses)

  1. Janaki Nagaraj says:

    You have done a wonderful job with the opposite!

  2. Yet another lyrical masterpiece! Bravo! πŸ™‚

  3. Jan Neel says:

    what a wonderful job you have done!! Simply marvelous! <3

  4. Adriene says:

    That’s stunning, Tameka. I love seeing these side by side. I see where you took the liberties but they are still mirror images. I’m going to try this tonight for tomorrow using Do not go gentle into that good night by Dylan Thomas. We’ll see how that goes… πŸ˜‰

  5. Andy says:

    Hello.
    Love the contrast between these two. Nice job! Thanks for sharing.
    http://thoughtsofbeautyinthestillnessofdawn.blogspot.com/2012/04/day-1719-quicksand.html

  6. sulekha says:

    I was going back and forth, like a Yo Yo πŸ™‚ loved your complex poetry and the fact that you took up this challenge and did justice to the theme. BRAVO…
    http://sulekharawat.com/2012/04/18/p-is-for-poem/

  7. kriti says:

    Strangely I can associate with both the original and the reworked. Sometimes I feel I have lived a hundred lives in this one life : ) Loved being here as usual!

  8. rimly says:

    Love both the poems Tameka. You are so good at expressing your thoughts

  9. Janaki Nagaraj says:

    This is beautiful.

  10. Thanks a million Janaki, Martha and Jan. I’m humbled. Hopefully I can complete this challenge. Starting to get weary. πŸ™‚
    Yes, Sweepy, I had to take a few liberties. Some of my lines didn’t make sense with the opposite meaning! LOL! This was a lot of fun though. I might try it with some other writings. I loved your Opposite Day poem. It was amazing!
    Thanks Andy! I’m trying to keep up with everyone else! πŸ˜‰
    Thanks Sulekha! Boy was this a challenge! Fun though! πŸ™‚
    Kriti! Thanks so much mamita! I felt like I was living a hundred lifetimes while revising! LOL! Hugs!
    Thanks so much Rimly. I try my best! πŸ™‚

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